Don’t dive straight in…
And just so we’re clear, the obvious parts aside, don’t overlook the entire rest of the body. You’d be forgiven for thinking that the sooner you get started down there, the better, but in actual fact the longer you can hold off and the more you can pay attention to the rest of her body, the better the pay-off will be.
Stepping back even more, don’t underestimate how sexy it is to delay sex. My girlfriends and I often joke that there are men who are so sexy with their clothes on that we find them so much sexier than half-naked male models.
From famous actors to people in the street, there’s something glorious about a little mystique. If you’ve ever read a romance novel (and I’d recommend it, just once) you’ll find it full of lingering looks, ‘accidental’ touches and slow build-ups that get women buying one Mills and Boon title every second all over the world.
That’s good news for you, because it means that all you really need is a little confidence to slowly ramp up the intensity, and the willpower to delay things a little bit, and all that anticipation can be hotter than the raunchiest action.
We love the romance of the encounter as much as the deed itself, and sometimes the best sex we ever have is no sex at all – at least for a little while in the beginning. Keep that bit going for as long as you can, because the better the build-up, the greater the sex.
Thanks to Kate for our sex re-education. You’ve heard it from the ones who know best about how to be a good lover and now it’s time to practice.